I had high expectations for China. The Political and Economic Development Program looked like it was made for me: it was hosted by my father’s alma mater, it was in my mom’s hometown with all of my relatives, and I LOVE economics, there was no way that it could not be totally perfect. But the first day, on the bus ride to Peking University, all I saw were dreary, identical communist-era apartment buildings, blending together in the grey smog-covered skies, and I was drowning, not only under my expectations, but also under the humidity and heat of China in the dead of summer.
But my problem was not China, it was the fact that I expected my life to change in one day, and it was the fact that I expected it to all happen at once. My life did change, I absolutely did have that life-changing, once-in-a-lifetime study abroad experience, but it took until now to realize what I truly gained. I see now what people say about the importance of reflection, because I really needed this distance, physical and in the context of time, to see how this journey benefitted me.
I think that college is about more than just a degree and a job; it is about exploration, trying new things, and gaining perspective. So although this didn’t outright change my major or what I want to do in the future, or my direction in life, it did change the way that I see the world, and the way that I carry myself, so it did change the way that I will approach that direction. I can say that, without a doubt, traveling with a group of people that I had previously not been friends with has simultaneously forced me to become more independent, but also challenged me to work on my team skills. I have grown, but in tandem with the other 30/40-something students on this program, and that is something I never had the chance to do in a traditional school setting. I got to learn about China, in the context of China, from professors who grew up in China, and that perspective, unclouded by Western bias was a truly amazing one to be exposed to. All of these personal gains could not have been learned by reading a book or writing an essay, so yes, this study abroad experience changed me. Not all at once, not immediately, but I see the results, and these small personal milestones will carry me to the next ones.
My Chinese Class at the Closing Banquet