Lesson Aims
- Pleasure scheduling
- Distractions
- Mindfulness
- Tolerance and acceptance
- Recognizing, challenging, and replacing self-defeating thoughts
The Big Picture
Did you know your mood can play a role in your potential success? A negative mood can prevent you from reaching your goals and make it difficult to regulate emotions. In contrast, a positive mood can make healthy lifestyle changes easier to accomplish and sustain.
Mood regulation refers to how you go about recognizing your own emotions, and then how you react to and manage them. Your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors are all connected, but these connections aren’t always obvious. In this lesson, you will learn more about how your thoughts and mood affect your behavior which can affect your ability to maintain healthy lifestyle choices.
Your thoughts, emotions, and behavior are related! When you are in a bad mood, it can affect how you think and behave in a way that promotes physical inactivity, overeating, and/or smoking. Engaging in healthy behavior change can be challenging when you’re experiencing a bad mood. Feeling down can make you doubt your abilities and lower your confidence. It’s very human to want to wait till you feel better to engage in health behaviors, but that mindset can become counterproductive. Changing your actions will probably improve your mood! Likewise, doing something healthy for yourself, big or small, can make you feel better about yourself and your abilities, which can make it easier to change your behavior.
Because your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors are all connected, strengthening one area strengthens the other two! Next, we’ll review some strategies you can use to keep your mood on an even keel and bring it back into a positive zone when it dips.
Pleasure Scheduling
One way to regulate your mood into a steadier positive zone involves peppering rewards throughout the day or week. Taking short water breaks at work,
rewarding yourself with a gift after accomplishing a goal, or planning specific outings with your family and friends are just a few examples. A way to start to make healthy lifestyle behaviors more enjoyable is to pair them with something you already find pleasurable or rewarding. For example, if you don’t currently find exercising enjoyable, pair it with listening to music or a podcast you enjoy. Or, if it’s unpleasant to wait out a craving to smoke or eat a high-
calorie treat, pair that time with doing something fun, like playing a phone game, calling a friend, or taking a bubble bath. You can take these pleasures that you already enjoy and apply them to new situations that involve your STELLAR goals. This will not only help you reach your goals but will make the process more
enjoyable. When the process is more enjoyable, you will be in a better mood, which will then further reinforce your behavior – a positive cycle will form!
Here are some steps you can follow to begin pleasure scheduling:
- Identify activities and rewards that you have found enjoyable in the past. Start brainstorming a variety of ideas!
- Assess your current schedule. When do you have time available to add something pleasurable? Do you need to carve out ablock of time to do a fun activity or can you do the activity while sticking with your current schedule?
- Pick out a few rewards that you can pair with the healthier habits you’re trying to create. Self-reflect to see if the pleasurable pairing works well for you. Be consistent with your pleasure scheduling. Set reminders and form a routine.
Distraction
Sometimes, a negative mood catches you before you’ve had time to schedule a pleasurable activity. If that happens, an alternative technique to improve your mood is to find a brief distraction! When you find yourself having negative thoughts and emotions, dwelling on the situation usually intensifies the gloom you are experiencing. Interrupting your thought pattern is key! One way to disrupt negative emotions is to change your behavior or environment. You can do this by moving to a different room, calling a loved one on the phone, doing sudoku or a crossword puzzle, listening to music or a podcast, or going on a brisk walk. A common misconception about distractions is that they are used to completely avoid your upset feelings – but that is not true! You can use distractions as a strategy to reset your mood and keep it from becoming worse. Shifting your attention to a brief distraction lets you clear your head. That helps you approach the situation with a clearer frame of mind and cope better in the long run. Start thinking about distractions that will work for you! Make a list and try out a distraction the next time you feel yourself starting to get overwhelmed or stuck. If you need help brainstorming distractions, ask your health promotionist in your upcoming session.
Mindfulness
Practicing mindfulness is one way to regulate your mood and understand your own emotions. Mindfulness is paying attention to your thoughts and feelings in a non-judgmental way. It is an awareness and acceptance of what is going on inside you each moment without becoming overly reactive or overwhelmed. A good exercise to illustrate mindfulness is the “leaves on a stream” meditation. You might want to try it out here.
The technique helps you gain some distance from your thoughts and feelings by envisioning, putting each one on a leaf and just watching it float down a stream. Upset feelings, worries, resentments, etc. still happen as you calmly observe them. They don’t get you upset at the moment because they’re just thoughts and feelings that you see and then let go to float away. For cancer survivors, mindfulness can be a helpful way of dealing with worries – like fear of cancer recurrence. Doing this tends to put things in perspective. As you realize that you are more than your thoughts, you’re empowered to recognize that you have the resilience to neutrally observe and accept any thoughts and feelings that come to you without overreacting. Mindfulness techniques like meditation, yoga, and deep breathing are often recommended to help reduce stress. Practicing this skill does not require long periods of time. It can be practiced through short moments of mindfulness, two or three minutes, called “micro-practices.” With practice, mindfulness can help you free yourself from reactive, habitual patterns of thinking and acting.
Some simple ways to practice mindfulness include:
- Connect with your body through strong, deep, and slow breaths. As you breathe, become aware of the sensations in your body and the thoughts that come to the surface. When your mind wanders to these thoughts, focus on your breath to bring you back to the present. You can do this at the start of each day or when you are waiting in line, even at the bus stop!
- Start a mindfulness journal. Journaling can help you better understand yourself and your feelings. One method of mindful journaling is to write down, without filtering or judging, a few things that happened and thoughts and feelings that you had that day. Some people find this style of journaling very refreshing and informative because you can discover unexpected patterns by seeing which events, people, thoughts, and feelings tend to bunch up together for you. Practice being fully present in the moment. Instead of letting your mind wander to your “to-do” list while you brush your teeth, bring your attention to your breathing and pay attention to the sensations that arise during the task at hand. Try doing the same thing during other routines that you perform every day – like eating lunch or washing the dishes. By consciously practicing mindfulness, you will reinforce your self-confidence and build awareness that you are strong and in control!
How to Replace Self-Defeating Thoughts with Helpful Thoughts
There is an important difference between self-defeating and helpful thoughts. Self-defeating thoughts will interfere with achieving your goals for the STELLAR program; helpful thoughts will allow you to pinpoint specific challenges and adjust. Self-defeating thoughts make people feel like they aren’t “good” enough and can’t reach their goals. This “can’t do” attitude can cause people to lose their drive to progress to their full potential. These thoughts are often difficult to pinpoint because they can occur beneath the surface of our awareness. If you find yourself constantly having any of the following reflections or ideas, you may have underlying self-defeating thoughts:
- Comparing yourself to others. Thinking that lifestyle changes come easy to others, but not to you.
- Procrastinating tasks or avoiding them altogether. You may be afraid of failure, causing you to self-sabotage before you even try to make a change.
- Assuming you know what other people think of you and often imagining the worst-case scenario.
- Being overly critical of yourself and setting unrealistically high expectations that leave you feeling anxious.
- Persistent feelings of inadequacy and low self-worth. This may manifest as overgeneralizations and negative conclusions about yourself based on how you are doing with your STELLAR goals.
Typically, self-defeating thoughts lead to a negative mood. Having a growth mindset can help counteract self-defeating thoughts and develop a more positive mood. A growth mindset means that you believe that with effort and learning, you can improve over time. People with growth mindsets tend to overcome obstacles with more ease than people without them. This is because people with growth mindsets view challenges as learning opportunities! Because of this, we would like you to practice developing your growth mindset by replacing harmful thoughts with helpful thoughts. Below are some examples of common self-defeating thoughts that can be changed to helpful responses with the use of a growth mindset.
| Self-Defeating Thoughts | Example | Helpful Thought Replacement |
| All-or-Nothing Thinking | Either I’m perfect on my diet, activity, and smoking plan, or I’ve completely failed. | Making a mistake is not the same as failure. |
| Jumping to Conclusions | Since I ate chocolate today, reaching my healthy eating goals is impossible. | I don’t have to be perfect. I make healthy food choices most of the time. |
| Negative Fortune-Telling | I won’t be able to resist smoking at the party. | No one will force me to smoke. I need to prepare myself in advance. |
| Discounting the Positive | I only walked for 100 minutes this week. I deserve credit only if I reach my activity goal. | I deserve credit for every positive action that I take. |
| Emotional Reasoning | Since I feel so hopeless about reaching my goals, it really must be hopeless. | Everyone gets discouraged sometimes. My goals are unreachable only if I decide to give up. |
| Labeling | I’m a failure for overeating, skipping my workout today, or smoking a cigarette. | Of course, I’m not a failure; I reach my goals most weeks. |
| Mythologizing | If I eat standing up or smoke slower, it doesn’t count. | A calorie is a calorie, no matter how I consume it. |
| Excuses & Rationalizations | It’s okay to eat these sweet foods, smoke, or miss my work out because I’m so stressed out. | Emotional eating is a habit I need to break. I need to tolerate my distress or cope with my problems in a healthier way. |
| Exaggeration | I’m totally out of control with my eating, and lack of activity, and can’t help my craving to smoke! | I may have strayed from my plan, but I can start following my program again right away. |
Challenging Permission Giving Thoughts
Some thoughts give you permission to steer away from your healthy lifestyle plan. These thoughts usually have a kernel of truth to them at the time. Unfortunately, they also give you permission to stray from what you know is healthy and productive. Luckily, with practice, you can learn to reframe these thoughts so…
| It’s Okay to Stray Because… | How to Reframe My Thoughts |
| It’s just one little piece or bite. |
If I say yes to one bite, I may say yes to more and more. I need to try my best to say “no” when I can, especially if I am not hungry, or when there are healthier options available to me. |
| It’s not that fattening. |
I can find a healthier option that will satisfy my needs and be in line with my goals. |
| I’ll just eat less later today. |
I will try to consistently make healthy choices. |
| It won’t matter in the long run. |
Small changes add up! |
| I’m too tired right now to do any sort of physical activity. |
Physical activity often makes me feel more energized. I will try for 5-10 minutes and see how I feel. If I am still too tired, I will listen to my body today and rest for a bit. |
| I’ll disappoint someone if I don’t eat it. |
I will practice saying “no” and explain to my family and friends what my goals are so they can support me. |
| Everyone else is eating it too. |
If one of my triggers is seeing other people eat, I can eat something beforehand, so I am not as tempted to eat in the moment. |
| No one will see me smoking it. |
Sometimes having free time or knowing I am alone can trigger me to want to smoke, so I will try a different activity to distract myself. |
| It’s free. |
I can take smaller portions than I typically would, decide to give the treat to someone else or practice saying no. |
| I’m upset, and I just don’t care. | I will find a healthier coping strategy for when I get upset. |
| I’m craving it. |
I will find something to satisfy my craving and try to avoid, alter, or substitute the cue that may have caused my craving. |
| I’ll probably just smoke eventually. |
Quitting smoking isn’t “pass-fail,” even though reducing the number of cigarettes I smoke is challenging, I know it will become easier over time because my body will not be as dependent on nicotine. |
| I want to get my money’s worth. |
Instead of eating all of my meals in one sitting, I will save a portion of it for later. |
| I’ll exercise tomorrow. |
Even if I don’t have time to do my planned workout, I can set aside 10 minutes now to do an activity. |
| Other people are smoking right now. |
If being around other people who smoke is a trigger for you, try to make a different plan so you are not put in that situation. |
Self-Reflection
The next time you have an urge to eat something that is not in your healthy eating plan, start to stray from your scheduled physical activity, or have a craving for a cigarette, notice what is going through your mind. Identify the specific situations in which they most often occur. Then, respond with a new, healthier self-statement, like “Even though I had a bad day and feel I deserve a treat, I will eat an apple instead of this candy bar because I want to stay on track to reach my goals,” “Yes, I am tired, but I will feel so much better after I exercise,” or “I may be having a craving to smoke now, so I will go on a walk or do an art project to distract myself.” Find what strategy works well for you! Keep in mind that you do not have to have an all or nothing attitude to be successful with your goals. For the examples listed above, you can revise them depending on your needs. If you still feel like you need a treat and are not satisfied with the apple, try eating only half of the treat instead of the whole thing. If you are feeling exhausted and cannot complete your planned workout, try to adjust it by shortening the time, or switching to a different activity. If you are craving a cigarette, choose a nicotine replacement product to use while you reduce the number of cigarettes you smoke. The main point is, that there is not one specific way to be “successful,” and learning to be flexible with your goals will serve you well!
Each time you respond to a challenge or temptation in a more restorative way, you break a negative cycle and strengthen your new habit of healthy self-control. The more you practice making healthy choices and adjusting your goals, the easier it becomes!
Ideas to Apply these Strategies to Specific Behaviors
Final Thoughts
You don’t get a say in many things that happen in your life. It’s not fair. However, you do get a say in how you respond! By scheduling pleasure, practicing mindfulness, utilizing distractions, and other cognitive strategies, you will learn to regulate your mood and make your route to success a bit less challenging!
Assignment
Activity: Shake Up Your Thoughts Excuses
1) List some of your common thoughts or excuses for negative behavior.
2) Next, write down a healthier response for each of the thoughts in number 1.
Give Yourself Credit!
3) List three positive changes you have made during your first week in the STELLAR Program that will help you manage your weight and improve your health.
4) Starting today, try to think of or record 1 or 2 things you did right each day. List your credit-worthy behaviors (e.g., “I walked for 30 minutes today…YEAH! I feel great!”) below and write down positive words/phrases to give yourself a pat on the back. Use another sheet if you run out of room!
| Credit-Worthy Behaviors | Positive Words/Phrases |